Rambles' Ramblings

Ramblings, a salve for any hurts




I remember talking about dreading to go home a few posts earlier. And now, I want to explore the meaning of the word “dread”.

First off, I need to say this: whenever I want to discuss the meaning of any words, I do not mean I am going to find a dictionary and look up its meaning and distinction. I mean that I am going to talk about what the word feels to me. Idiotic, maybe, but that is what I like to do: dissect each word to my satisfaction.

So, what about “dread”? To me, dread is a dark, heavy coil of fear and distrust settling in your belly. Darker than your darkest fear, it is tinged with distrust of your safety, physical or mental. It makes you reluctant to approach the object of your dread, even if you know that you are safe from physical harm.

To dread something is to be reluctant due to fear and mistrust. More potent than mere fear, it paralyses your thoughts and actions, till that you are as though in a dream, bogged down by numbness.


It isn’t right…

It isn’t right to wish you are out of your home.

It isn’t right to wish that you can leave the home.

It isn’t right dread coiled in your belly when you go home.

It isn’t right to wish you do not have to return home.

It isn’t right children have to intervene to prevent quarrels between the parents.

It isn’t right that a child have to shoulder the responsibility of a parent.

It isn’t right to hope to vanish somewhere.

It isn’t right to hope to not see your family.

It isn’t right to wish to talk to anyone but there is no one to talk to.

It isn’t right to only find out that you are truly alone when you needed help the most.

It isn’t right that this can only be told to the blog anonymously.

It isn’t right that I want it all to end..

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